Who I Truly Am

"I may always feel subject to the forces of echolocation, moving to and from experience and reflecting back again, but like the bat I can determine outcome. I do this in every thought and in every action. Every day I have to inventory the messaging. Edit and rewrite. At times there may be a little retrofitting to get the landscape to better reflect my desired outcome, but I have to do it again and again until it is true. Until all of the messages rattling around in the sound chambers of my mind are reflective of who I truly am. Simply charming, vastly likeable, perfectly self-deprecating and absolutely wonderful! As for now I am happy to be a work in progress."

Maran Hanley, Echolocation of the Soul: A New Perspective on Identity

I love her words. The complete article can be found here. Here she is, enveloped in the eyes and hands and love of those who are lucky to call her wife and mom.

Thoughts on Creativity

Sir Ken Robinson gave a TED talk about creativity and referenced Dane Gillian Lynne. Gillian was given her title by the Queen due to her contributions to dance and theatre. Gillian choreographed Cats and Phantom of the Opera, and many other shows. She is now 88, still dances, and is married to the love of her life, who is 27 years younger than herself. Her life story is incredible.

Sir Ken Robinson and Gillian had lunch one day. When he asked her how she became a dancer she said she was helpless in school. Her mom took her to the doctor because she couldn't take it anymore. The school, in the 30s, wrote to Gillian's mom and told her they thought she had a learning disorder. The teachers told Gillian's mom they would call her "wriggle bottom" because she didn't have an attention span and couldn't stop moving. Gillian's mom took her to a specialist. While Gillian sat on her hands for 20 minutes this doctor talked with her mom about all of her problems. After a bit he went over to Gillian, sat by her, and said, "I need to speak to your mother privately. We will be right back. We won't be long." The doctor and Gillian's mom left her, but, before walking out of the room he turned the radio on. Outside the room the doctor told Gillian's mom to stand and watch her daughter. "And the minute they'd gone, I lept up, I lept on his desk, I lept off his desk, I danced all around the room. I had the most fabulous time." Said Gillian. Outside the room the doctor said to Gillian's mom, "There is nothing wrong with this child! She needs to learn to dance. She is a born dancer." He told her to take Gillian to a dance school. And she did. Gillian told Sir Ken Robinson, "I can't tell you how wonderful it was. We walked in this room and it was full of people like me. People who couldn't sit still. People who had to move to think. Who had to move to think." Gillian eventually auditioned for The Royal Ballet School. She became a soloist, had an incredible career there, graduated, and founded her own ballet school. She Met Andrew Lloyd Weber, is responsible for some of the most successful musical directions in history, has given pleasure to millions, and is a multi-millionaire. Gillian says she owes the doctor her life and her career. She said he saw an energy in her--and she feels she was possessed with one of the most unusual energies, "And he saw it." 

NPR: "If you can teach creativity, where do you start?"

Sir Ken Robinson, "...inspire interest in passion, curiosity, and light up peoples' imaginations with the interests they themselves have for a particular discipline or field of work." 

This is called freelensing. I am learning a lot about photography and even more about my style and even mooooorrre about what causes me to run around the house shrieking with joy - what sets off fireworks inside me because I made something my own. These photos' imperfections are exactly what makes them perfect to me. I took a risk and the most beautiful part is: the outcome doesn't matter! This newfound journey is one of growth and practice, as all things in life are, and I am not in a hurry to get anywhere - I want nothing more than to fill my cup to overflowing with creativity and joy.

As an aside, there were four artists/CDs that blared through my family's house (and car) while growing up: Mariah Carey, Celine Dion, Whitney Houston, and The Phantom of the Opera. My mom would only cruise with the windows down, her foot hanging out the window of the car, and Whitney blasting through the speakers. And that was in 110 degree Sacramento weather. My dad would crank the stereo in the house and "THE PHANNNNNNN-TOM OF THE OP-ERA IS-SS THERRRE.....IN-SIIIIIDE MY MIND......" Oh, the good, good childhood memories. We went multiple times when I was younger to see The Phantom of the Opera because my dad loved it so much, and I'm happy to now know the inspiring story behind the choreographer. I even feel thankful for the doctor that told Gillian's mom to put her in dance class, and for her mom who took some great advice.